December 15, 2004 | CORRECTION: ***UNPREPARED FOR DELIVERY***

I got two emails today with the "prepared for delivery" version of Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge's remarks today in Los Angeles where he was announcing a homeland security grant.

The corrected text starts off:

LOS ANGELES - Good afternoon. It is great to be here at Fire Station 27 with the people who are on the front lines protecting this city and our nation. The LA Fire Department Museum and Fallen Firefighter Memorial next door vividly remind us of the sacrifices our first responders make every day to keep our communities safe....

The original text reads:

LOS ANGELES - Good afternoon. I thought I was coming to Hollywood to audition as the next James Bond. Despite the fact that my wife tells me I’m as handsome as Pierce Brosnan and as suave as Sean Connery, I did not get the part. Studio said I don’t have the right accent. Well I can fix that. I just hired a new speech coach, Governor Schwarzenegger…I told the studio, “I’ll be back.”

It is great to be here at Fire Station 27 with the people who are on the front lines protecting this city and our nation. The L.A. Fire Department Museum and Fallen Firefighter Memorial next door vividly remind us of the sacrifices our first responders make every day to keep our communities safe...

They should have corrected these jokes before he delivered them. (If indeed, the poor guy actually did try to tell these jokes).

Bureaucracies are good for many, many things. (No really, they are.)

Creating humor intentionally is not one of them.

In fact, I hear Ridge's jokes bombed so badly, he later had to raise the threat level.

Posted by Ryan Singel at December 15, 2004 02:48 PM

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